The World U Love

Haih~
It seems like i just can’t stop sighing these days. Y not? I had a messy first time experience in Rhet 103 class last Wednesday and of course an assignment that i have to finish by Monday yet i still have no idea how to do it. Ain’t i so damn lucky? *sarcasm alert*

Hm… at first i thought to change da Rhet 103 class to ESL coz it’s so much easier plus we only have to do one semester english course jekk. But, tetiber other Rhet kids kater their Rhet classes are exciting. So, they decide not to change la pulak. So, tinggal la aku di awang-awangan… Do i want to change to ESL or not? Shit la… i hate it when i have to make decision, especially da hard ones. Can’t anybody just make it for me? =P wut spoiled brat…. But it’s true that it’s not fair to make a quick judgement on that class. I mean, i only have been there for once. So, what me, the new student, know? Maybe i need to give it another chance. Yet, the thought of being alone in some class where almost all the students just don’t give a damn bout what you say is pretty depressing… But on second hand, i can mix with other international students, right? Ye la tue…. (elok la. aku tanye, aku jugak yang jawab)

uhuh… tomorrow will be my first day in economic discussion class. sorang lagi…. haih. aper la nasib. ne pi sumer dak m’sia yang laen?? xkan amik klas dancing kot? how dare them to leave me alone… anyway, to avoid of being glabah lagi in a discussion class (like wut happen in calculus class 2day), i think it’s better for me to do some revision la weh. Today’s nyer calculus class, puh, no need to say la. Memang aku glabah tahap glaban! Ne tak nyer, h/work x siap!! N then da professor asked each of us to do the mathematical problems on the board. Da h/work x finish, memang deserve la to be panic kan? In the end, i wasn’t called pon. Wat penat jekk menggelabahkan diri. chisS…
Ne way, nasib baek la there was dis helpful english guy sitting in front of me. Maybe he knew i didn’t finish my h/work, so, he turned around his seat n help me with da questions. Fuyoo. Baek gler mamat tue. Siap tunjuk paper dier kat aku. He did all da questions on ONE paper. Me? Hm… after careful calculation, i used about 1/4 of the big notebook just for those questions. Tapi x siap gakk…. aiseh. Wey Minah! If ur reading dis, i want to say thank u la for lending me ur book so i can copy ur work. You make my world a better place once again. TQ!!!

Hm… i think it’s better for me to buzz off now. Need to finish the unfinished business (the cal work and the econ’s reading). So, maybe i’ll come again here. I think….

Hello~

aih… it has been a long time since i didn’t write here. Well, time has moved so fast and i’m barely catching up. It’s unbelievable yet true dat i’ve made it to Illinois! Finally. After hours and hours and hours of spending my time with none other than the awfully big, green calculus book, i finally passed da MARA requirement. Thank God!

But living in illinois is not only fun n play. Staying for almost 2 weeks in here make me realize the importance of self-appreciation. U see. For me (n maybe other international students out there), living in a place where almost everyone is so unlike u is pretty hard. For once, u have different skin color than theirs n sometimes it makes u pretty awkward for being different n kind fo weird to their eyes. Then, here comes the cultural differences stuff.  My senior used 2 say dat da ppl here respect us becoz of da tudung we wear. Well, i kind of find dat pretty true. Yet, i somehow get dis feeling dat maybe SOME of them r just scared of us. U know after da Sept 11 incident……. But, i do find a lot of friendly ppl here too; like our neighbors in LAR (nice party), the ppl we meet across the street who actually smile at us n say hello (thank you for making my day), the staff at da cafeteria who has been so nice to us (thanks for the omelette or whatever da hell that is), n da list goes on.

(Actually i dunno wut the heck i’m saying so i’ll just go on mumbling bout my feelings ere)…  Well, i do hope dat my staying here in uiuc will be the biggest turning point in my life ever (for da better of course).  I hope to make bonds with other students especially the non-Malaysian ones (i luv my Malaysian frenz…), score da MARA requirements (luv u too MARA), find my passion, get to know who i really am, be the person i want to be (without being a hypocrite), n of course, understand da meaning of life (da purpose of y God send us here).

Well, i guess dats it. I’m outta here.

p/s dad, wherever u r, i luv u. n mom too. n sis. n my annoying brothers of course. peh~ i miss them